Posts Tagged ‘housewife’

I was almost over it, I swear.  The onslaught of press for Thor:The Dark World had subsided and I’d all but forgotten the plot of War Horse (okay, that’s not  true because the title gives it away:  it’s about war and a horse!)  With the impending holidays providing motivation to get my house in shape for visiting relatives, I was back to reality and feeling confident that my Loki/Tom Hiddleston phase was quickly becoming a thing of the past. Soon it would be just an awkward memory of that time . . . that dark, dark time when I found myself simultaneously checking airfare to London, searching StubHub UK for jacked up Coriolanus tickets, all while calculating how much I could “borrow” from my children’s college fund.

“Sorry kids, I know I promised to fund a few semesters of community college, but mommy had a little bit of a  - Shakespeare problem a few years back . . .”   That was a reality check.

Also, there were no tickets available.

So I moved on.  I was doing really well until my poorly drawn husband, whom I left for Loki a few blog entries back, surprised me with an early Christmas gift.

christmas loki

Yes – it was a life size cardboard cutout of the Norse- God- turned-Marvel- Comics- villain, Loki.

Wow.

Why?!?!? Was this an act of love and support for my mania or a twisted payback for my ill-conceived, poorly rendered comic?   Was he trying to tell me something?  What was I supposed to do with this? More importantly, where would I hide it when the in-laws came to visit?

I put it downstairs in the family room/music studio where it freaked out my kids while they played video games.  My youngest thought he saw it move and both boys felt like they were being watched. The first evening I went downstairs to practice music I turned on the light, turned around and nearly screamed at the stranger lurking in the corner. Loki, you trickster, stop . . .  just standing there!

I had to find something else to do with Loki.  If he were real what would I want from a mischievous Norse god?

Dishes.  I’d want him to do my dishes and maybe even tidy up the kitchen a bit.  After all, there’s nothing sexier than a man working in the kitchen and his brother was easily domesticated.

Thor domesticated

Not only did he serve the breakfast, but you know he was going to clean up afterwards while Jane sipped coffee and worked more on her looney toons astrophysics thing.

Would it kill you to at least create the illusion that  my kitchen wasn't so cluttered?

Would it kill you to at least create the illusion that my kitchen wasn’t so cluttered?

Doesn’t really work.

Maybe some role play?

stormtrooper

“I’m Loki Skywalker. I’m here to rescue you, although I’m not feeling inclined to do so right at this moment.”

Nah.  It’s a little creepy and probably involves more copyright headaches than it’s worth.

Finally, here we are, alone at last in the boudoir.  Loki, quit smirking.  You know why we’re here.

bedroom 1

laundryThat’s right, I need to fold this laundry.

Bonus scene!

bathroom

I’ve faithfully recreated the Asgard prison set in my bathroom. Awesome!

While it’s true that I could have written out and addressed all of my holiday cards in the time it took  to complete this little photo-journal, I will say it did yield one good result. I finally figured out how I will hide Loki when the in-laws arrive.

IMG_5374

Happy Holidays!

Deadhau5Wife

A couple of weeks ago I decided I needed some really heavy bass synth sounds for a song I’m working on.  I loves me some free VST Plugins, but thought I might broaden my horizons and check out free demos to see the range of what is out there.  I came across Native Instruments’ Massive, immediately downloaded it , fired up Cubase and was ready to give it a whirl when my son called me into his room.  He wanted to show me something he had created.  I tried putting him off for a few minutes while I messed  with a couple of the presets,  but it became apparent he really wanted my attention so off I went.

After checking out my son’s latest Lego creation, I headed back towards the kitchen only to spy a basket of laundry I had collected a little earlier that day.  I decided to be proactive and take the laundry down to the washing machine.  Once I had the wash started I realized there was more laundry in the dryer.  I’ve been working very hard to stay on top of things and not let it all pile up, so I took that laundry upstairs, folded it and put it away.  In the process I came across a shirt that needed a button sewn back on.  Well, there happened to be a few things in my “needs mending” pile, so I took all of that out to the living room, sat down and made necessary repairs. Now I felt really good about myself.  I was getting things done!

I started towards the bedroom by way of the kitchen when I saw my laptop sitting there with  an odd message on the screen.  I immediately checked it out in fear that is was my  virus protection software alerting me to some download doom.  Nope.  It was simply a message from Native Instruments telling me my thirty minute trial of Massive was up and thanking me for giving it a try. D’oh!